Relationship philosophy
It is a good thing to deliberately add values to relationships. Think about how most people go through relationships. Does one person leave significant value to another? Is there a conflict in the relationship? These things usually happen when values and beliefs are not talked about and do not align with each other. Most conflict in any relationship is caused by different values or beliefs. After all, if we all agreed that what is most important, there would be no need to argue. A Relationship Mission Statement Can Help!
We all come from different backgrounds
Think about how you grew up, your environment, money, food, school and many other things. Did you make your partner grow up? Have your parents taught you different lessons about TV, food, religion, or friends? We all bring expectations into our relationships, but most likely they are not the same for each of us. So why do we think that things are supposed to magically create goals or align values, without talking about it. After all, if the bumps cannot be smoothed, the couple looks for someone like me. This is not a bad thing, seeing a professional can be incredibly helpful and can restore the peace and longevity of your relationship.
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Check with your partner
For now I offer you a simple way to check in with each other, communicate and see the future. Creating a relationship vision is a simple and helpful tool. It does not take much time and it can really target the lasting happiness of your relationship.
To create a relationship vision, sit a few steps by yourself for about 30 minutes. Remember that this should not be done in a day.
Steps to break things up
1. Go for the positive
When phrases are churned in a positive way. For example “We will not envy” instead of saying “We will not settle things in peace and peace” or “We trust each other” instead of saying “We do not argue”.
2. Write down your non-negotiators and wishes
Write your “must-haves” such as “We will be parents together” or “Exercise is important” or “We will communicate openly and respect each other’s point of view”. You can also write that, “going out of our union is non-negotiable”, “monopoly is highly valued”, “attending church is a priority”, “traveling and experiencing the world with your partner Is a high priority. “ Make sure this is not a laundry list for your partner, ie he mimics the lawn and does the laundry.
3. Explore the many areas of a relationship
Since we have a multi-faceted life, it is important to address as many of these as you feel necessary. Expressing desires, desires and values along with sex, finances, lifestyle, upbringing, career laws, leisure time and education are some of the things you want to consider in your relationship vision. Answer questions about these topics such as what do I enjoy in my spare time? How important are finances? Do I want to work full time? Do I need a 401k? What about insurance? Is my job required to provide it? What percentage or time do we spend with in-laws? How do we allow them to interact with children? Is Sex Satisfying? Do we want to explore new sexual ideals? Do the answers align with my values?
4. Come along
Come together as a couple and discuss the things you agree on first. Then discuss what is negotiable and make short sentences that are important to both of you. Leave out the things you do not agree on last. See if you can compromise on these issues if this is not where someone like me comes. A professional helping couples work through the difficult stuff and it will benefit your relationship for a lifetime.
5. Set a time
Weekly, monthly, quarterly or whatever works for you, but make sure to come together if you are on track. The best way to ensure that you both meet your needs and if you have tracked off is to address it. This will also give place to development. Since nothing is the same in life, people, situations, events, or relationships, it redefines the room, changing the relationship between the two of you.
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